This is kind of a weekend update. I woke up to this song in my head this morning at 3am when I abruptly woke up to the smell of smoke in my parents guest bedroom. I sat up and made sure that I wasn't dreaming - yes it smelled like smoke. So I jumped up and opened the door and the rest of the house did not smell like smoke, so I was smelling around the room like a hound dog and woke up my poor husband who basically just fell asleep and he did not smell anything. At this point I couldn't smell anything either. I felt like a dumb ass. So I laid back down and smelled smoke every once in awhile and Jason still couldn't smell it. So I came to a conclusion. I was dying. I pictured that I was going to be on the next "Monsters Inside Me" or some scary TLC show. This is the interview I made up in my mind:
Interviewer: When did you first know something was wrong?
Me: I started smelling smoke randomly and no one ever smelled it!
Interviewer: So what is the final diagnosis?
Me: I'm dying of a smoke parasite that is living in my brain and it is slowly deforming me.
Then it cuts to pictures and videos when I was happy and normal.
Then while I laid in my parents old bed I realized something - I am a nut job. Then I started thinking of the bed that we were sleeping in. My mom had this bed I think since she was 15 or 16 and it was my parents bed for years. It was a double bed and my dad was so tall that he had to hang his feet over the edge of the frame of the bed. When my parents finally got their California King my dad said he had a hard time adjusting because his feet were not hanging off the bed. I always thought that was hilarious. I'm surprised that their bed was never broken by us. When my parents would go out to dinner we would run into their room and twist around the bed posts like it was a Magic Mountain ride. We never had a problem finding fun. So, my sister and I ended up sharing my mom's old bed when we were in high school - Tabi was 16 and I was 14. My sister Tabi was never someone that you could get to laugh easily and when we started to share a room I needed to have her think I was the funniest person on the planet because my sister Heather would always laugh at the silly things I would say. Tabi was different. So I needed to use drastic measures. The top of the bed posts could be removed and used as fake microphones for my serenades to Tabi. One of the songs that finally got her to laugh was the famous "Because she" song. Don't ask me the lyrics because I used to just walk around the room holding the top of the bed post like Frank Sinatra making up lyrics, but the whole point of the song was to explain what Tabi was doing or not doing - the start of every lyric started with "Because she...". Confirmation = nut job.
Jason played this song a few times on the way up to visit my parents. We then started talking about how cool Jason Schwartzman is. I said "Yeah he's hot." Jason almost swerved off the road and looked at me and said "What! You think he is hot!" I said, "Well he is not like Christian Bale or Brad Pitt hot or anything but - yeah he's hot". So then I listed the below items of why I think he is hot:
1. Great personality (because I know him so well)
2. Dresses cool and has good style
4. Love his movie selection and characters
He finally understood my thinking.
I got to see my Grandpa a few times this weekend as well. He has been sick and is in an extended care facility until he finishes up his antibiotics. It was so good to see him. Sitting and talking with him, my Grandma and my mom I realized why I am the way I am. My grandpa sat there talking about his favorite songs and why he loves music. I told him about my blog and he said "You are like me! I wake up with songs in my head too! I love song lyrics and melodies." We sat and talked about musicals and his time in Navy. He has been through so much but I really believe he will outlast us all! He is really the energizer bunny. I promised him to be a good granddaughter and visit him more. He said, "Make some time for the old guy." Umm....stab to the heart.
On a food point which my friend TILTE will love. We went to the Hitching Post in Casmalia for dinner on Thursday night and stuffed ourselves with the most amazing food! Their artichoke appetizer is ridiculous and I dream about it. I had a 5oz Filet and a baked potato. Everything was delicious! I don't know how my parents don't go there every night!
By the way - the smoke smell was from a trunk that my mom had in the room. It was my sister's when her massage room caught on fire from her dipshit partner who left the candles burning. The company cleaned the trunk but you can still smell the smoke every once in awhile. We were there for 4 days and finally smelled it on the last night. So you will not see me on the next episode of "Monsters Inside Me" or TLC. Whew!
Here is the song: